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August 28th, 2008

thanks, brain!

I woke up at 3 am with my heart pounding, from a totally surreal nightmare about trying to get rid of a live grenade that somehow kept returning, like a boomerang or like a big cartoon bomb as experienced by my hapless Warner Brothers alter ego. And it would never go off, but I knew it was going to, anyway, and for some reason I had no strength to throw it hard enough to make it go away.

And you know how sometimes you're awake but not really, in that some part of the forebrain is functioning, but the sleep paralysis is still weighing your limbs down and your cognition is muddled and drunken and surreal? I must have been very deep under when I woke myself up, because that lasted for a subjective millennium, while my hindbrain was screaming that a serial killer is in the room with you and you need to get away now!

Anyway, for like fifteen minutes after I finally really woke up, I couldn't shake the sensation that somebody else was there.

This is what I get for case reports before bedtime, isn't it?

Really wish I knew what my subconscious thought it was symbolizing with that tar baby hand grenade.